Guide to Confession

or

The Sacrament of Penance

as practiced in St. Bartholomew's Anglican Church, New Bern, NC.

The penitent first kneels at the altar rail where the priest is waiting to hear confession

Priest: The Lord be in thy heart and upon thy lips, that so thou mayest worthily confess all thy sins; in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Ghost. Amen.

Penitent: Bless me, Father, for I have sinned [the penitent then says how long it's been since their last confession (If it is the first confession ever made, the penitent may, instead, state so) and proceeds to confess the sins committed since that time, noting, if possible, the number of times the individual sins were committed. (approximate numbers are fine, for example, 'several times' or 'many times.' This is helpful to the priest to know whether the sin is an unusual occurrence or a habitual sin.)]

The priest may thereafter inquire briefly about certain sins mentioned (the contexts around them, the motives for such actions at that time, etc.), offer words of encouragement and advice, and may assign a penance, which is an outward expression of repentance and sometimes a practical exercise in removing the root cause of the sin.

The Prayer of Absolution: Our Lord Jesus Christ, who hath left power to his Church to absolve all sinners who truly repent and believe in him, of his great mercy forgive thee thine offenses: And by his authority committed unto me, I absolve thee from all thy sins in the Name of the Father, and the Son, and the Holy Ghost. Amen

Go in peace for The Lord has put away your sins, as far as the east is from the west, and in your christian charity, pray for me, who am also a sinner. Amen.

FaQ

Q: How specific do I need to be?

A: Be as specific as is necessary for the priest to understand what you are mentioning, and whether it is a habitual sin. It is not necessary to describe sins in extreme detail.

Q: How far back do I need to go, especially if I have never made a confession?

A: One should make an attempt to confess the sins of which one is aware since one's last confession. If one has never made a confession, a good faith attempt should be made to confess sins committed since one's baptism. In this situation, it is perfectly acceptable to be general in regard to details and numbers; for example, 'On many occasions, I have entertained uncharitable and envious thoughts toward those around me.' From a practical standpoint, the confession of sin becomes easier once a Christian is in a regular habit of participating in this sacrament.

Q: What if I forget a sin and then remember after confession?

A: If a confession is given sincerely with a true heart of repentance, upon the granting of absolution all sins are forgiven, those remembered and those forgotten.

"The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit: a broken and a contrite heart, O God, thou wilt not despise." - Psalm 51:17

Q: What if I purposefully omit a sin in my confession?

A: To conceal a sin knowingly would add the additional sin of sacrilege (misuse of a sacrament). God is already fully aware of our sins, and his minister is himself a sinner and seeks only to administer God's mercy and healing, so there is no reason to conceal anything.

Q: Can the priest tell other's about my confession?/What is the seal of the confessional?

A: The seal of the confessional means that everything revealed to the priest is absolutely, permanently, and without exception, confidential. The priest may not reveal it, allude to it, hint at it, or act upon it in any circumstance or any time, whatsoever. The priest is not permitted even to think about what he hears in confession voluntarily, or to mention it to the penitent at a later time. To reveal the contents of a confession in any way is among the most serious sins a priest could commit and potentially grounds for removal from priestly ministry

Examination of Conscience.

It is always good to, if possible, make an examination of conscience before entering into confession.

An examination of conscience is a prayerful reflection on one's past thoughts, words, actions, and omissions in regards to God's law and is used to help call to mind our sins and failings before approaching the priest for Confession.

The Seven Deadly Sins.

There are many guides to making a good examination of conscience. Presented here is one adapted from the Pocket Guide to the Sacrament of Reconciliation, as published by Ascension Press. This examination uses the concept of the 'Seven Deadly Sins' as a guide; others may use the Ten Commandments, the Beatitudes, or other similar guides to Christian living.

Sloth

Have I used words that demean God, the Church, or his saints?

Have I willingly missed Mass on Sunday? Have I left Mass early without sufficient reason?

Have I failed to show my parents proper respect?

Have I neglected my duties to my husband or wife and my children?

Have I neglected to care for myself?

Have I taken or wasted time or resources at work, school, or home?

Have I broken a promise or failed to live up to my responsibilities in a contract?

Have I been lazy in my duties to God, my family, or my work?

Have I neglected to spend time with God in prayer?

Envy

Have I spread false rumors or gossiped about someone?

Have I rejoiced in the difficult circumstances of another?

Have I been overly critical or judgmental?

Have I resented my current vocation or state in life?

Have I been jealous or envious of another’s blessings, ignoring the gifts I have been given?

Have I been reckless or careless with my money or possessions?

Have I made purchases out of a desire to keep pace with my peers?

Greed

Have I placed people, achievements, or things (possessions) before God in my life?

Have I allowed someone or something to direct my decisions against God’s guidance and will?

Have I engaged in occult activity (New Age practices or superstition, such as consulting a psychic, tarot cards, or a Ouija board, or the worship of Satan)?

Have I supported, advised, participated in, or had an abortion? Euthanasia?

Have I, with selfish motives, avoided the conception of children?

Have I placed value on material possessions over spiritual growth?

Have I failed to be grateful for what I have?

Have I shared the gifts that God has given me with the Church and those who are less fortunate?

Pride

Have I refused to accept and live by the revelation of God in the Scriptures and the teachings of the Apostles?

Have I denied the existence of God? Have I formally abandoned the Church?

Have I presumed on the mercy of God (committing a sin with the expectation of God’s mercy)? Or, conversely, have I despaired of God’s mercy (thinking I am beyond the healing mercy of God)?

Have I knowingly received Communion in a state of grave and unrepented sin?

Have I shown disrespect for those in authority, either in the Church or in the government?

Have I attempted suicide?

Have I despised myself or the gifts I have been given because I compare myself to others?

Have I supported or engaged in any acts against human life?

Have I refused to show respect toward someone because of their race, gender, nationality, or religion

Have I cheated in any way (on a test, in sports, in business)?

Have I embellished stories or lied to make myself look good or others look bad?

Gluttony

Have I busied myself on the Lord’s Day, not observing that it is a day of rest in the Lord?

Have I neglected the minimum hour-long fast before receiving the Eucharist without sufficient reason?

Have I refused to fast or abstain on the designated fasting days without sufficient reason?

Have I put the lives of others in danger by driving recklessly, distractedly, or under the influence of drugs or alcohol?

Have I consumed more food or drink than I need?

Have I abused illegal or prescription drugs? Have I abused alcohol?

Have I purposefully withheld material goods from those in need, even when I have an excess?

Lust

Have I respected the sexual dignity of others and myself?

Have I willingly viewed pornography?

Have I committed adultery or engaged in sexual activity outside the context of marriage (whether by entertaining thoughts or by action)?

Have I used my sexual capacity in any context other than a sacramental marriage?

Have I failed to give my husband or wife my exclusive love and attention?

Have I been flirtatious with someone who is not my husband or wife (if married); or have I flirted with someone who is married to another (if single)?

Have I watched movies or TV shows, read books, or listened to music that degrades the sexual dignity of the human person or encourages sexual impurity?

Have I willingly put myself in a near occasion of sexual sin either by myself or with someone else?

Anger

Have I used vulgar, unkind, or uncharitable language, especially about or directed toward another person?

Have I criticized anyone without first approaching their shortcomings with compassion?

Have I harmed another person (including myself) physically, emotionally, mentally, or spiritually?

Have I hated another person or wished evil upon someone?

Have I withheld marital intimacy from my husband or wife as a form of manipulation or punishment?

Have I withheld forgiveness, even when it is actively sought from me? Have I refused to seek forgiveness when I have hurt someone?

Have I sought revenge?

The Ten Commandments.

There are many guides to making a good examination of conscience. Presented here is one intended for children taken from Seven Frequently Asked Questions About Children and the Sacrament of Reconciliation written for the Archdiocese of Milwaukee by Kathleen D. Beuscher

This examination uses the Ten Commandments as a guide; others may use the Seven Deadly Sins, the Beatitudes, or other similar guides to Christian living.

I.

I am the LORD thy God; Thou shalt have none other gods but me.

Have I wanted more things, making things or money more important than God?

Have I made an idol of sports or entertainment figures?

II.

Thou shalt not take the Name of the Lord thy God in vain.

Do I use God’s name carelessly?

Do I use God’s name in anger?

III.

Remember that thou keep holy the Sabbath-day.

Did I attend Mass on Sunday?

Did My behavior make it difficult or impossible for my parents to get to church on time?

Have I remembered to pray daily?

IV.

Honour thy father and thy mother.

Did I obey my parents?

Have I done my chores without complaining?

Do I do my chores without being reminded?

Have I been disrespectful to teachers, coaches, or others in authority?

V.

Thou shalt do no murder.

Do I keep my patience or do I lose my tempter?

Do I old grudges and try to get even with others?

Have I been unfair to others, especially those who are different than I am?

VI.

Thou shalt do no murder.

Do I show respect for my body?

Do I respect the bodies of others?

Do I avoid harmful things like drugs, tobacco and alcohol?

VII.

Thou shalt not steal.

Have I take something that belongs to someone else?

Have I “forgotten” to return something that I borrowed?

Have I used money responsibly?

VIII.

Thou shalt not bear false witness against thy neighbor.

Do I play fairly or do I ever cheat at school or games?

Have I been honest or have I lied?

Have I hurt someone by what I have said or done?

Have I copied someone else’s homework?

Ix.

Thou shalt not covet thy neighbour's wife.

Have I been jealous of friends that someone else has?

Have I tried to be kinds to others?

X.

Thou shalt not covet thy neighbour’s goods.

Have I been jealous of things that my friends have?

Have I nagged my parents into buying things because my friends have them?

Have I helped others when they needed help?